“So how did you become a yoga teacher?”
Every now and again, someone will ask this question, and the absolute absurdity of the lead-up to my becoming a yoga teacher makes me laugh. Short answer, “ACCIDENTALLY!! I didn’t mean to . . “
Long(er) answer. Because of my dog - and his broken spine.
I’d been flirting with yoga a long time. We’d sometimes be together passionately, sometimes we’d take a break. Sometimes we’d get together sporadically and wonder why we did. Was it fulfilling? Was it all an illusion, the thing we had? But we could never leave each other completely. In one of our longest committed periods, I’d begun to think I wanted to give my yoga practise more. To deep dive. To immerse myself in a yoga retreat - away form the comforts and distractions of home - asana and meditation twice a day - time to step it up a notch. So I booked a retreat. Thailand!! Ten days!! Yoga and I were finally going to make it real.
That was a Friday, (payday!) I put down my deposit and knew this was going to be the start of something wonderful. Little did I know. The next day, out of nowhere, my beloved, adored, spirit-guide, best friend, sweet angel Mercury the Jack Russell Terrier woke from a nap, tried to get out of bed and his back legs did not work at all. He dragged himself across the floor and I just went into a total meltdown. What was happening? Quick ring the vet. Late on a Saturday afternoon they were closing and with that situation they would have only recommended going to specialists at the animal hospital. So that’s where we went. He stayed in for scans. He’d burst a disc in his spine, fluids had pressed on his spinal cord. He was paralysed. Surgery as soon as possible was required. He may or may not walk again. It was a gamble. A very expensive gamble, would we consider euthenasia? Of course not. Money was only money. There was only one Mercury. So I handed over my credit card without a second thought.
Back at home, less than 24 hours after booking, I cancelled my yoga retreat. With the cost of the surgery, there was no way I could afford the retreat as well. Sorry yoga, it wasn’t meant to be.
Short story long, after surgery Mercury came home, and with months of care and daily physio and massage, finally he stood up at his dinner bowl while he ate. His legs were shaky, and it was only for a few seconds, but he stood. After three months, he began a walk of sorts, shuffling along, but able to get around without my help. Then came running, climbing stairs and jumping on the couch. He was always a bit wonky from then on, but all the money and work were worth it. My little Mercury had been there for me when I most needed support in my life, and it felt right and good that I could return the favour. But what’s that got to do with becoming a yoga teacher? Well, this. After the first few months of work getting my dog back on his feet, literally, I was exhausted! It had been such a demanding period, I hadn’t even noticed while it was happening. My back ached from lifting and carrying, I was emotionally drained. I needed a blessed yoga retreat.
Now my partner, my love, my human best friend and soul mate suggested that I just do the next thing my favourite studio was offering. Treat myself. But the next thing was a teacher training. I wanted a holiday in Thailand. I didn’t want to teach yoga. But still, he said, it would be something for me, it would let me focus on yoga, why didn’t I give it a go? So I did. And I enjoyed it. I looked at my practice in a whole new light. I was able to instruct. I was able to be myself in front of a group of people. I stripped away pretense (no one likes a pretentious teacher) and bared my soul while doing it. It was good. Somehow it seemed right. I think the challenges and rewards of living selflessly in care for another being had changed me deeply and made me ready.
After training, the studio asked me if I would like to trial as a teacher. Wanting no regrets, no “what-if’s” hanging around to haunt me, I said yes. And I’m still teaching yoga to this day. Since that first training, I’ve undertaken many more. Honed my skills. Committed to being the very best teacher I can be. There’s been times of doubt, (oh doubt you ole devil) but I’m still teaching. Still seeking to serve others in this small way. All the things in my life led to this point. This point has been the beginning of a new life for me. I know now this is my dharma. This is my calling. This is why I am on this earth.
Still, occasionally I wonder, what more can I do? Can I keep plugging away and continue to be a conduit, passing the thousands of years of learning and wisdom of yoga, drop by drop, to more people? If I can, I feel I ought. So this website came to be born, thanks along the way to a plucky little dog with a busted spine and a spirit that lifted mine.